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By Kiran, September 9, 2009 12:24 am

From Funny Or Die!

Gus Porter gets mauled by a bear, but he won’t let the socialist Canadian health care fix him up, so he’ll hike back to America.

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By Kiran, July 28, 2008 9:52 pm

1. Live for the past.
2. Live for the future.
3. Think everything is always about you.
4. Think that you just don’t matter at all.
5. Believe that pills will solve all your problems.
6. Believe that pills are stupid and useless.
7. Do not let yourself change.
8. Believe that it is all your fault.
9. Believe that it is all other people’s fault.
10. Accept all the bad things you have heard, read or thought about you.
11. Deny any good things you have heard, read or thought about you.
12. Never think about other people’s problems.
13. Think that because you can’t do everything, you shouldn’t do anything.
14. Roll your eyes while reading this list.
15. When happiness comes, greet it with fear or guilt or resentment.
16. Think that you are or have bad luck.
17. Don’t express yourself creatively in any way.
18. Keep on trying to please and/or piss-off Mom and/or Dad.
19. Wait for someone else to come and save you.
20. Exercise only sporadically and only out of guilt.
21. Don’t make friends with silence.
22. Watch a lot of TV.
23. Stay away from Nature.
24. Think of everything in terms of black or white.
25. Take all, give nothing.

~Kiran Mehdee [June 2008]

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By Kiran, June 24, 2008 12:37 am

So many things to occupy time, so little time for them to occupy.

Here’s an interesting interview I came across with author Salman Rushdie

For the other geeks among us, you might find PC World’s list of the Top 50 Tech Visionaries inspiring.

Here, you can listen to an audio version of a Q&A between Stephen Colbert, Steve Carrell and Ann Hathaway (listen to the audio online by clicking on the link in the middle there).

Lastly, but definitely not leastly, here’s a tribute to the funniest guy who ever lived who died this past weekend, George Carlin. The world was funnier with ya, George, we’ll miss your sick, twisted, brilliant brain. Here he is, in his own words…

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By Kiran, May 8, 2008 2:12 am

My dad forwarded me this pic that just says it all…

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By Kiran, March 31, 2008 4:45 pm

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said “Stop! don’t do it!”

“Why shouldn’t I?” he said.

I said, “Well, there’s so much to live for!”

He said, “Like what?”

I said, “Well…are you religious or atheist?”

He said, “Religious.”

I said, “Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?”

He said, “Christian.”

I said, “Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?”

He said, “Protestant.”

I said, “Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

He said, “Baptist!”

I said,”Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?”

He said, “Baptist Church of God!”

I said, “Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you reformed Baptist Church of God?”

He said,”Reformed Baptist Church of God!”

I said, “Me too! Are you reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879, or reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?”

He said, “Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!”

I said, “Die, heretic scum”, and pushed him off.

By Emo Phillips